So, beginner 1 classes can have children of all ages. I told Alivia she would be with some bigger kids because she was in the six year old class. Then on the way to gymnastics I started to think, the kids could be 10 they could be twice as big as her. I tried to warn her.
Me: Alivia your class is for kids that are 6 and OLDER so there could be some very big kids.
Alivia: I know (she knows everything)
Me: Don't worry, Kara will still be your teacher and she will make sure you are ok.
Alivia: And she will make sure the big kids don't knock me down.
Me: right (from the rearview mirror I thougth Alivia looked concerned so I continued) The first class is alway's a little scary but remember, when you are afraid, you just do what you need to do and you will have fun. You may have to use your courage and be brave.
Alivia: MOM, STOP TALKING! I AM NOT AFRAID!
Okey Dokey. Maybe it was me that was afraid. Afraid my tiny little girl would be overwhelmed by the big kids. Afraid she would be in over her head and it would be all my fault.
I took her in and Kara came down the stairs to get the class and take them upstairs. Alivia tromped right up and got in line in her bright pink boots and her gymnastics leotard. She climbed up the stairs with the big kids who were at least a foot taller than her. I could no longer see them. I couldn't help, I couldn't watch to make sure it was going ok. I just waited...an hour.
When she came down, I asked her how it was and she said "It was good, I was better than all the other big kids." I hope she keeps that confidence her whole life.
I would not have anticipated the nervousness that I felt with this experience. Motherhood is so complicated.